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But he went out and then came back into the house down the center aisle and screamed, “This is shit! This is shit! Fuck Terrence McNally!”, and my head went right to, Don’t shoot the messenger, don’t shoot the messenger. The audience didn’t know whether it was part of the show or not. And Into The Sewing Room I Go To Lose My Mind And Find My Soul Shirt, hoodie, tank top
So I’m terrorized. They’ve won with me. They won with me after 9/11, and I am terrorized now with this homegrown terrorism. Not that a Proud Boy or a Boogaloo Boy is going to buy a ticket to Company just to shoot up my ass, but you don’t know. I have been vocal about my hatred for Trump, so I don’t know how safe I am on stage. I mean, when I said what I said on the red carpet at the Tony Awards three or four years ago, [“I hate the motherfucker,” 2017] the hate mail was insane. There was maybe one with a rational critique, but the rest of them were crazy, and I thought, well, now I’m out there, and now, if I go on stage I’m vulnerable.
It’s equivalent to stage fright, in that you don’t get stage fright every single night, but I’ve been on stage and all of a sudden I have stage fright and I don’t know why. It just comes over you, and you think, Oh, what’s going on? What’s going on? What’s going on? Concentrate. Concentrate. Don’t leave the world…
I feel a sense of paralysis. I really do, and I think it has to do with all the misinformation that we were made to ingest during those four years with that clown in the White House. So now I’m thinking about going back on Broadway, and it’s almost the last thing in my head. I said this to Marianne Elliott when I was in London in rehearsal for Company and I actually said out loud, I don’t know what I’m doing here. I think I began to offend her, so I said, no, no, no, this is about America. This is about Trump. I said, I feel superfluous. I feel being on stage doing a musical is superfluous in these times. And in a way, I feel that now. I know that theater is a relief for people in the audience, but what about the people who have to do it?
Jennifer Simard When Company comes back, the scene that I have with Christopher Sieber is quite physical and requires me to be in really good shape. So my next few months or however long it takes is about getting in shape. It’s a pandemic, and we’re all just trying to survive, but I definitely gained the Covid 15. So I bless those pounds, I thank them for their service, and now it’s time to say goodbye to them. It’s time to move on.
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